Duality Identity

We all have struggled and thirsted to answer questions. We have flown into the darkness and space and solved complicated riddles that have eaten at the human race for decades. And yet all of it, the entire body of knowledge that we have amassed and will amass is nothing when we pause to realize we have so little knowledge of ourselves. We do not look inward beyond that which we see. I would dare to submit that what we do see is just an idealized picture of what we want to believe we are. Underneath that is our true selves. Because we hold on to the idealization and permanently maintain the true self, we are in a constant state of conflict and the selves we have created are also in a constant state of conflict. This is what I will call duality identity.

Duality identity is not a mental illness like multiple personality disorder. It is just a part of who we are and our development. It is a an ongoing and fluid process; ever evolving based on collective experiences. It is also not what some would term "the animal inside us." Far from that actually. The animal inside us never changes because it is based on the primal hardwiring we all share. Duality identity is, as I stated, an aggregation of experience dispersed over who/what we are and who/what we perceive our self to be. I cannot give a more specific definition than that because duality identity is unique to each of us and something that only each of us can find though self discovery. If you dare to look that close. And not that you have to. Consider this: every time you consciously make an effort to go out of person, to be something or someone else for work, relationship etc, you are allowing duality identity to rear its head and act.

I do not know why or how duality identity is created. I feel however that it is a form of protection based on our aggregated experiences. Like a protective exoskeleton, it shields the internal contents of self. Perhaps this is out of our fear of ostracization or rejection based on the real self. Perhaps it is out of our own selfish ego that we create duality identity so that we can sell our self to ourselves with more fanfare. Maybe it is both?

I can speak of duality identity because I am witness to it in myself. My duality is not your duality and the degree to which is inhabits our lives varies extensively. Insomuch that I understand my own duality identity, I will try to explain it so that you too can experience the true self and the other self:

I am a man that lives between two worlds. These worlds are as distinct from each other as they blend like the meeting place of a Venn Diagram. At face value, I am a smile, a warm individual, and for the most part socially acceptable. This public face is one that is quite natural because 90% of the time this is what the world will see and I have found it is what the world accepts best. I, just like you, use this identity as a means to relate with the bluest of collars and the bluest of bloods. It is all about affability which seems to be the consensus across the masses. We want to be able to operate as functional actors and in some ways we must act like functional actors in order to survive.


There are signs at this level that should clue you into my duality. My tattoos, my scars, my ever changing hair. All are tidbits that offer a portal to the other world. We all have them. It can be an item of jewelry, a nervous tic, or habit. They are the crumbs on a trail that lead to where the duality identity resides.


I am a man that lives between to worlds. Deep beneath the surface is a cooler identity. This is the man is calculating and closely rational. This man has seen pain and love. This man has seen death and torture and lived to remember it with crystal clarity. I keep this man shrouded because it is an input-output machine and its propensity for being unable to feel is as great as my desire to survive. I laughs at cynicism and fear only two things: God and letting my other half, the other identity, get the better of me. This is Achilles Heel, if the other identity enters unchecked into this world, I fear vulnerability. In order to safeguard that, I keep the physical world around in constant check by balancing the duality identity against one another. If I was purely one I would be a lie, but if I was purely the other, I would be the lone wolf. This is the same for all of us in some form or fashion.


Duality identity is our clothing. We put on what we need to in order to manage life. It may not be stylish but like a good raincoat it is functional. So I ask you readers, look into your life and see where your duality identity lies. What is it made of? Where did it come from? How does it serve you?