All is questionable in love

Guts: 1) A colloquial term for the inner contents of the stomach area.
2) A apparatus for thinking and/or thought processes (see also: heart).

A singer, I believe Tina Turner, once asked "What's love got to do with it?" Good question but I think we can all agree that in love (the concept) all is questionable. Mainly because it is an emotion and thus a chemical reaction. Ouch. That is a bit cynical. So let's revise that. Some people would submit that love is chemical and thus can be over once that reaction stops. On the other hand, there are those that believe love is eternal and much like the chameleon, ever changing and fluid. I am assuming this is what makes for long, wholesome relationships.

Love has much to do with life and many of its aspects. I think that we have to pause and see how we define how we define what love is. Which brings me to the word of the night: guts. Particularly, the second part of the definition above. So often we hear cliche little terms like "my gut tells me..." or "I am going to listen to my gut on this." (the latter of which I heard today regarding the concept of love). Evidently we have moved pretty much as a society into thinking with probably one of the most irrational parts of our body, the stomach. This is the same apparatus that makes us farty and bloated. The same part that in one fell swoop will have us on our knees in pain while heaving orange sherbet colored vomit.

We have deferred to our guts because we are afraid of the truth. I am part of this too. I am scared of the truth as much as the next person but at some point we all have to face the music. Truth is the nexus of heart and mind. Note; no guts in that equation. Perhaps ironically we have disconnected the line between our hearts and minds while at the same time cultivating a distaste for anything vaguely honest. Truth has become to us what anyone Hispanic is to Arizona: reasonably suspicious.

In the case of love, it is easy to ponder, rethink, doubt, troubleshoot, and generally misunderstand what it is. We fear it because it makes us vulnerable. The second we love we become open to heartbreak and exploitation. Both are salient fears. There is nothing worse than investing one's self only to find what we loved has made off with our emotions in a Bernie Madoff heist. Secondly, when we love something we have to address other realities such as commitment, committing, self-worth, perceptions, etc. There is a smorgasbord of potential candidates and I have no intention on getting into all of them because hopefully you got the point.

Here is the truth. What ever make up the feelings of love for each of us is subjective. It is a process of perception and we always will make a choice to deny the facts of what IS or face the music. Both choices are risky. The former may seem less so but in denying one takes a path that ultimately will lead in disappointment. It becomes a cycle of placing realistic emotions in the trash and supplanting them with secondary or even tertiary afterthoughts. On the other hand, as addressed above, facing the facts leaves us open and immediately in a poor defensive position. Or so we think. Conversely, while difficult, thinking with both the mind and heart will lead to a valid conclusion. That is to say, one that is likely a closer approximation to reality than denial.

Frankly, I have been done with thinking with my gut for a long time now. Well, two to three years anyways. It has never gotten me anywhere and it is a waste of my time. However, in finding a nexus between heart and mind, metaphysical and fact, I have come to reconcile so many issues in my life. I put my head on the chopping block each time, but for what I truly love it is worth that risk. Albeit a calculated risk. I am not afraid because I cannot be. The truth that is in my heart and mind is going to be of stronger mettle than any heartbreak or exploitation.

So the question is if you are willing to accept the truth readers? Are you ready to think not with your gut but with your heart and mind in unison? If you are than I think your fears will be quelled and you will find answers to the questions you hold quietly to yourselves. It is not to say that I think you should never fear and nor should you blindly assume the best. You should be cautious. What you should not do is let caution take the wheel and steer. Deep down we all know the answers and we all know the realities of life. Sometimes my dear readers, you need to take a step forward into the unknown and follow your heart and mind where it may lead.